Guidelines for using an ACA Group

    * Remember that you will only get out of this experience what you put into it. Attendance is not enough. You must make the effort to practice what you learn so that you can change.

    * Open yourself to the possibility there’s a better way than what you’ve been doing all your life.

    * Promise yourself you’ll try some of the suggestions you hear and keep that promise.

    * Make a commitment to keep coming back, even if you don’t feel like it. Six weeks is minimal to determine if the group is for you.

    * Stop holding back for fear of what others will think of you.

    * Try to make at least one phone call a week to a member of the group. Break the pattern of suffering in silence.

    * Share something every week, even if it’s hard for you to do so. This will help dissolve isolation and victim consciousness as well as build trust.

    * Try to feel at home in the group. Talk to at least one new person every time you can.

    * Remember that you are here to build new behaviours and attitudes. So quit practicing the old ones (at least in small ways, until you are stronger).

    * Listen to what others in the group say and think of how it relates to you. Every person in the room represents an aspect of you. Learn from them.

    * Give yourself permission to be vulnerable.

    * Read all the books and literature about adult children of alcoholics that you can find. Knowledge is power and the truth will make you free.

    * Make the group a priority in your life. Schedule other things around it because you deserve a better life and are willing to work for it.

    * Be willing to be totally honest with yourself at all times. This is the key to knowing that the truth will set you free.

    * Read the 12 steps every day and try to relate them to your life and experience. Use the Serenity Prayer in the same way…wherever you are and whenever you need it.

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